*like a movie trailer announcer* One challenge, five days, five different voices...
*coughs* Ahem. Onwards to the writings!
My feet pound through the streets under the clear, dark sky. Every muscle in my body is tense.
It should be raining. The stars shouldn’t be allowed to shine at a time like this. They’re practically mocking me, those stupid stars. Go away! I don’t want to see you!
They don’t listen. Of course they don’t. Why would I ever think they would?
I shoot a glare upwards with some false idea in mind that it will make me feel better about myself. Just as I do, a shooting star soars across the heavens. My fists tighten, my nails dig into my palms to the point where I wonder if I’ll draw out my crimson blood.
I nearly make a wish—a sheer habit of mine—but thank goodness my subconcious stops me before I can waste my precious thoughts on something so trivial. And to think I once believed those foolish stories about all my dreams coming true.
A longer one but I felt that I couldn't have explored this character's voice properly without the extra words. If you're a Voice Week reader and want to return to base or if you want to read more posts like this, here's a shortcut. Thanks for reading and commenting!
An intriguing mix of poetry and disillusionment. Without even knowing why this character is so angry/frustrated, I feel some sympathy.
ReplyDeleteI was a little confused, though, about the use of "subconscious." Surely it is the character's subconscious that is automatically wanting to wish, out of habit, and it's the conscious thought, the memory of whatever has made the character bitter, that stops her (I'm not sure why, but the character strikes me as a "she").
That's a good point about the subconsciousness. Habits tend to be subconscious...I never thought of that until you brought it up. Thanks for pointing it out!
DeleteAnd also, thanks for commenting :)
Whoa. Now this person seems to be a dreamer who's trying to force themselves to be more logical for some reason. I like the visceral descriptions of running, bleeding, glaring.
ReplyDeleteThat's a great way to describe it, you're bang on! I'm glad you enjoyed it :)
Deleteoooh, a much angrier version this time, and I like the depth you add by showing that the used to believe!
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
DeleteI get a lot of anger and bitterness. I love how the description really reflects that too.
ReplyDeleteStori Tori's Blog
Yeah, they're not a happy character...
DeleteThank you ^ ^